awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize