no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize