just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
