Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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