They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
