Texts From Last Night

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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.

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  (860): my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf. http://tfl.nu/4sug
  Replies (22) Good night (1198) Bad night (4263)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.

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  (513): you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression. http://tfl.nu/ehn5
  Replies (6) Good night (1109) Bad night (2971)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.

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  (516): Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style. http://tfl.nu/uxcc
  Replies (60) Good night (8502) Bad night (1851)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.

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  (204): I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back. http://tfl.nu/sbtj
  Replies (7) Good night (826) Bad night (5410)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society

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  (614): I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society http://tfl.nu/ns4r
  Replies (20) Good night (3445) Bad night (1301)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.

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  (330): he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away. http://tfl.nu/7b3j
  Replies (6) Good night (3498) Bad night (1147)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.

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  (520): I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again. http://tfl.nu/aob4
  Replies (3) Good night (1044) Bad night (3094)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.

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  (919): It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn. http://tfl.nu/o70k
  Replies (6) Good night (1272) Bad night (622)
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  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months

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  (787): Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months http://tfl.nu/wlwj
  Replies (4) Good night (1188) Bad night (547)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.

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  (904): Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire. http://tfl.nu/weew
  Replies (14) Good night (1131) Bad night (600)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.

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  (712): I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple. http://tfl.nu/5d4d
  Replies (1) Good night (945) Bad night (652)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!

  (1-416): View more from Toronto

  Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken

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  (416): Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?! (1-416): Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken http://tfl.nu/8jmi
  Replies (7) Good night (1115) Bad night (437)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick

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  (713): I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick http://tfl.nu/vk4p
  Replies (2) Good night (858) Bad night (352)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.

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  (410): If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password. http://tfl.nu/o837
  Replies (0) Good night (443) Bad night (290)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again

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  (512): Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again http://tfl.nu/zxqw
  Replies (2) Good night (331) Bad night (522)

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