Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?

Fav 22 786 2653
share tweet
(718): View more from New York

I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?

Fav 27 994 3438
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(631): View more from New York

woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?

(516): View more from New York

you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."

Fav 67 12055 1727
share tweet
(314): View more from Missouri

shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.

Fav 9 4696 1947
share tweet
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(808): View more from Hawaii

You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.

Fav 27 1889 3564
share tweet
(678): View more from Georgia

I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.

Fav 1 2223 1032
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(915): View more from Texas

I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.

Fav 5 3401 1151
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.

Fav 3 1123 609
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(514): View more from Quebec

Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?

Fav 2 13 32
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT