You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
