I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
