Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
