And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
