You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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