That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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