and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
