Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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