Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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