He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I am mentally ready for anal.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
