Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
