i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
