Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
