Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
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He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
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Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry