Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
