I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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