Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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