When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
