ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
