But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
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Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
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My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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