I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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