How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
My boob is missing a layer of skin
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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