Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize