I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
