We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
