Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
