woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
