i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
