I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize