Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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