it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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