I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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