How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
The struggles of a small town man whore
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
