i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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