Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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