i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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