He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize