My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
