I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
