Texts From Last Night

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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings

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  (901): oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass (901): fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings http://tfl.nu/b0u6
  Replies (118) Good night (4268) Bad night (1263)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.

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  (214): I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this. http://tfl.nu/iqku
  Replies (46) Good night (6902) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.

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  (914): End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide. http://tfl.nu/bl6v
  Replies (74) Good night (6430) Bad night (1206) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.

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  (618): I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments. http://tfl.nu/a8pg
  Replies (8) Good night (5865) Bad night (967) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?

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  (510): Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night? http://tfl.nu/abjo
  Replies (6) Good night (3340) Bad night (847) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.

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  (541): I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me. http://tfl.nu/habi
  Replies (16) Good night (3491) Bad night (858) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.

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  (518): I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice. http://tfl.nu/enx3
  Replies (3) Good night (1449) Bad night (416)
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  (661): View more from California

  There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.

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  (661): There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind. http://tfl.nu/kx07
  Replies (9) Good night (1639) Bad night (515) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.

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  (719): If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila. http://tfl.nu/6g2r
  Replies (25) Good night (2000) Bad night (1126) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...

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  (239): His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during... http://tfl.nu/a1a1
  Replies (11) Good night (557) Bad night (2597) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus

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  (419): Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus http://tfl.nu/mjlu
  Replies (11) Good night (1429) Bad night (805) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ

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  (443): Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ http://tfl.nu/d2b1
  Replies (3) Good night (604) Bad night (242) Order T-Shirt
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.

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  (778): All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed. http://tfl.nu/ap4f
  Replies (1) Good night (270) Bad night (178) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.

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  (404): New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold. http://tfl.nu/ite7
  Replies (3) Good night (549) Bad night (167) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast

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  (440): That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast http://tfl.nu/nk0g
  Replies (6) Good night (471) Bad night (173) Order T-Shirt

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