kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
