remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm sobbing to NWA
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?