He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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