16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
