remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
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