so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
